The saga continues…
An awful lot has happened since my last post, less that than two weeks ago. Joyce and I have spent most nights together and so far nothing has occurred that suggests any looming difficulties. I am kind of limited in time this morning so I will make it short by just listing some high points. The sex has improved and this past weekend it was the best so far (without details, for me is was outstanding). And we I am growing closer and more comfortable with this new relationship everyday. Now for some high-lights.
Last weekend I was in Albion with Mom and Joe. I talked to Joe about a day in future when he may no longer be able to care for Mom by himself. I visited Bishop Place in Pullman where he said they know several people and might consider. It was very nice. Joyce and I had visited the Atria in Willow Glen, it was nice but no better than the BP in Pullman. BP is building a Alzheimer unit that should be ready next summer, in time that Mom might need that. (I imagine that the issue for Joe will be physical care before the dementia becomes unmanageable for him.) Ruth and I will talk to Joe’s kids about this and then confirm with Joe and if all agree then we will put them on the waiting list.
This weekend was very full. Friday, we had dinner, and attended West Side Story. Both were very good. Saturday, we had dinner with her friends Linda and Pete, there were some others there and it was very nice. It is fun to meet bright and stimulating people again. I reflected that for so many years my life was constrained by the Alcohol problems. First; Jo’s drinking nearly halted our social life, it was slow but continuous. Eventually we stopped going to parties and first spent much time together (as I tried to fix her) and later in the process we went out even less. Then when she entered treatment and started AA our social life centered on AA folks. I was happy with that but I was always a bit of an outsider and the conversations nearly always involved the program and people in the program. Now being back with people in a more normal situation is turning out to be very good. So far I have meet several of her friends and they are all wonderful people.
Yesterday we visited an elderly couple (Ross and Kathy) in Folsom. They were so much fun and I liked seeing how much they love Joyce. It is clear that they think of her as an important part of their family! I loved spending time with them too. Earlier on Sunday we meet briefly with her friend Ricci and Ricci’s sister and brother-in-law (Steve and ????), they were great people too.
We picked up a truckload of stuff at their house then we proceeded on the Placerville to meet Deanna and crew. We saw their new house (under offer contract) and also went to their current house. Deanna told me later that everyone liked Joyce and they could see how happy we were. Interestingly Deanna also said that Joyce was exactly like she had expected (from my descriptions) but that the other three were surprised. She attributed that to her communications. Although I wasn’t worried about their response I was happy that it is so positive.
We had a great day on Sunday. We woke up together, drove to Folsom and then to Deanna’s and home. We talked about a lot and had good time. Since we were both very tired we decided that I should spend the night at home so we could catch up on sleep. I did, and I slept well but I missed her, very much. She and I have talked a lot about what our relationship is like now and where it will go in future. I believe we see it very much the same, she is better able to articulate it but we agree. In capsule form; We love each other we want to be together today and we both expect our relationship to survive and prosper for the rest of our lives. We also recognize that it is a new relationship (we meet just 8 weeks ago last Saturday) and as such it may change so we need to allow for some to pass. We expect that one day we will both know what we need to do. In the mean time we joke about our situation, of spending nearly everyday and night together but not “living together”. It is interesting and so new to me that I find it to be both emotionally and intellectually an important thing to think about. All said though, I feel as comfortable and certain of my feelings as I have ever felt at anytime. Joyce says the same thing so I have a lot of confidence that we will be together for the very long term. But I feel no pressure and I think we can just allow our love to develop and grow better acquainted until we reach the time for something more. In the meantime I am at least as happy as I can ever recall being!
